Today I am...

...Thinking about vacation

...Mentally packing for vacation

...Deciding which books to bring on vacation

...Wondering if I really will find my bathing suit to take with me on vacation.


It's been lost for at least 6 months or maybe more (aka, since the last time I wore it. Which would have been over a year ago). I've convinced myself that really it probably just fell down behind a drawer in my dresser and I'll find it in time to pack this weekend. Or that it is just crushed underneath something in my closet and will show itself clearly when the time is right to put it in my suitcase.

The truth is, it's not at my in-laws (who have a pool and therefore that's usually where I use it). And I've kind of already moved some things around in my closet in my first feeble attempt to allow it to reveal itself to me. I've already pulled out one of the dresser drawers that it could have been hiding behind. No dice. (And I had quite the time getting the drawer back in.) I think I'm afraid to REALLY look for it (and haven't had time, honestly) for fear of discovering that it is actually nowhere to be found. Just in time for me to go on vacation where I will primarily be sitting by a pool. Awesome.

And yes, I do only have one bathing suit. I'm amazed at all the fabulous skinny people who have a different bathing suit for every day of their vacation. And who cannot understand that I only have one. For those of us who are...."curvier", (which is my nice way of saying "not a size 6"), finding a bathing suit that is remotely decent and not ugly as sin is a task within itself. So add that on top of the normal female anxiety comes with bathing suit shopping, and you have the potential for shopping trips that end in tears of frustration on the floor of a department store dressing room.

Well OK, I do have an old mismatched bathing suit that I can use in a pinch. Which is what I inevitably will be in. The top is a black Speedo top that will give me horrendous tan lines and that I think I bought when I was in college. The bottoms are pink and I bought them on sale at The Gap 3 years ago for about $5. They are too big. Too big, as in, when I used to dive in the pool they liked to... slide down/off. However, there is a teeny tiny silver lining of this cloud: And that is that the only advantage of having put on a few pounds...perhaps they will now stay put and I will not inadvertently flash all of Arizona.

But, I really would rather have my real bathing suit. It's a pretty color blue. And I like it. So, everyone say some prayers and cross your fingers that the real bathing suit does emerge from a closet or drawer somewhere. Because then, technically, I can be one of those fabulous people who bring multiple bathing suits on vacation.

PS - God help me, what if I do find it and it and, thanks to the aforementioned pounds, it no longer fits. OMG, I can't even think about that. Well, that just won't happen. That's all there is to it.

PPS - Um. This post ended up being a lot more about a bathing suit than I originally intended.